maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
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