Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Randomize
