I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
