The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I have aggressive nipples.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
