Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Randomize
