You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Randomize
