gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
