it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
im holly from the hills drunk
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
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