What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
