You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
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