Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Randomize
