Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize