I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
