would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
