that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
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