I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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