She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
