I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
