i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize
