we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
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