Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Randomize
