honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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