ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
