OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
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