Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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