Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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