Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
