I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize
