Barsexuality is the new black.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
