She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Slut skills are useful in every country.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Randomize
