mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
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