we have pet lesbian snakes
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
vagina is talking i cant
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
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