Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Come share oat with me in your robe
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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