Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
