I wannas sexs uuuuu
What did we do last night that was yellow?
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
