Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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