Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Randomize
