i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
