I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
