you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Randomize
