you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
