i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Randomize
