Kiss
Puke
I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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