in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass š¤·š¼āāļø
I just made the most āsingle lifeā Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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