I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
