you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Bring me that man meat
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
