It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
