Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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