New invention idea: vibrating tampons
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
