Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
